This morning, long before the crack of dawn, Shelby woke me up yet again with another bad dream. I was annoyed.
On the other side of the country, about that same time, someone was waking up their kid to go to school.
My neighbor's obnoxious car alarm woke me out of a dead sleep an hour later.
On the other side of the country, someone's kid was starting a normal day of school, maybe even looking forward to a holiday party or practicing songs to sing in a performance for their parents.
Shelby wouldn't get up for school. She was tired, she has a cold, she was yelling and crying that she wanted to stay home and she couldn't blow all the snot out of her nose. I yelled at her. I belittled her. I was mad because she was making me late.
In Connecticut, someone's sweet baby, the very center of their being, lay dead in a classroom.
On my way to a job, I was driving along dreading the weekend and the fighting and arguing that always comes with it. I was mad because I forgot my camera to take pictures of the snow on the mountains.
In Connecticut, someone was finding out that they would never see their little one alive again.
On my way to the second job, I was praying for a phone call from the boss telling me to take the day off. I was dreaming of cleaning bathrooms, stuffing my face, and taking a long nap.
In Connecticut, hundreds of innocent kids were faced with something that no one should ever have to face in their life, and innocence was gone, and will never be given back.
This afternoon, as I picked my kid up from school, someone was going home to house with a bedroom that belonged to their dead child. They might have stepped over a bicycle in the front walk that they probably cursed at the day before. They may have tripped over a toy left out, or stepped on a sticky spot in the kitchen. They may have been mentally killing themselves over harsh words as they drove their now deceased child to school that morning. They saw pictures on the fridge that they may have been tempted to throw away at one point. They saw shoes lying on the floor that the child will never wear again. They saw dirty laundry in the hamper that no longer needs to be washed. They saw chunks of toothpaste in the bathroom sink.
Please pray for God's comfort and strength over the coming days, weeks and years for all of those involved in this terrible tragedy. For those of you that want to know where God was while all this was happening...He was there with the teachers that were protecting their students. He was there with the first responders that had never seen anything so horrific in their lives, and yet were still able to take action and function accordingly. He is there in the nation, and even world that is mourning for the loss of lives, and grieving for children, staff, and families they have never met.
